polish donuts are called poonchkins

take me to a land where dreams come true..
you know, i was wondering if that shit can actually happen.. i remember growing up i used to watch a show called dragon tales, which still comes on t.v. incase you want to watch it.. i doubt it will be of any interest; however, my point is, this show took two youngsters to dragon land, where they met and hung out with dragons. i remember watching this show and wishing that i were able to go to a different world where i would be able to escape the realities of real life. which is ofcourse not possible.
i hate the thought of not being able to understand where and how this whole thing has come up again, possibly brought on by my long work hours, a ruthless boss, and a manager from an old work place who likes to flirt.
horrible right? it is in many ways.. but in some ways i do love my job, the pay cheque and also the perks. many perks i get.. which i do enjoy.. including trips.
however, i don't know how long i'll be able to stay under the pressure until i blow up.
i don't like to bring work home. but it follows me and stays around.. along with the lack of sleep and missed t.v shows. how sad am i?
i'm not sure if i want to post this.. but i think i will..
when i had to call in sick the other day .. my conversation went something like this "hello.. um hi.. i think i'd like to call in sick.. i think. um thanks.. bye" my lack of confidence due to this job scares me.
bloooody sugar sticks.
i think i'll finish off here and go take a long cold walk outside.. it's cloudy and cold. just how i hate it <3
toodles poonchkins

dreaming in colour

are dreams just figments of our imaginations or are they signs from somewhere to make us more proactive or so?

i've always been very curious about dreams.. those we dream at night which either make us scared, sad, happy or unknown (forget them as we wake).. or the ones that are almost goals we set in life to take us further down in life.
i mean i sometimes feel like i'm having a secret affair with myself, in my head, where i argue, cry, laugh.. and do all sorts of things i would with someone else .. i know i sound crazy but try to step into my shoes, i'll tell you how they feel right now:
i'm a 21 year old non-student.. i mean fashion school graduate. JUST a diploma.. feels like nothing now that it is done. so depressing i swear.
i work as a sales associate at the duty free.. which isn't terrible as there is room to grow.. but i want to grow now.. i don't have the patience i used to have.. i'm afraid of letting those down who have dreamt far bigger dreams for me than i ever could have.

i'm not sad that i am not where i'd like to be, i'm sad because when i do get a chance that the person on the other side can't see me past my minimal experiences..
the problem is.. i am experienced.. but perhaps the jobs i do interview for are looking for other specific things.. and my resume is nothing less than a jumbalaya of things unrelated.
i don't know how to precieve this at th moment.. i just hope that i can really follow my dreams soon.. that i can get a break..
but
reality is.. no one gets a break.. you have to break the glass ceiling.. that tough one up there.. i'm gonna make it to where i have set my goals to.. i want to travel.. and work.. and do both together... and shop and crunch numbers and do makeup.
i'm nothing short of complicated in my own mind however, i don't think i'm that far from simple.

dream big and don't fear your dreams.. you are far more capable then you think. trust me. never underestimate the power of true passion and greeed for success!

customers can go suck my

was at work today, obviously, and was so busy, i didn't get a chance to take a break to eat.

why are people who need HELP so fucking rude?

they come to me to get help, swear at me, tell me that i'm useless, then wait till i help them and then they leave. my manager tells me to "let customers vent" .... .... is she fucking kidding me?

let them vent? what the hell is that supposed to mean? okay fine, they can stand there and kiss their teeth while they wait because there are only two people working at a time, and fine, they can swear and ask me why i'm not helping them even though the person i am helping was there before them, FINE okay okay, they can swear at me also, but BUT the fuckers CANNOT insult me, i don't care who it is, i will talk back. i think people think they can get away with murder when it comes to customer service. i'm a little person, very petite, and i think that makes some fucking huge elephant sized women and men think they can intimidate me, not until they try. when i refuse to help them, i feel good.

my manager on the other hand is an idiot who only cares about sales and numbers, ofcourse, she does need her bonus, which makes me want to drop kick her on the face. bitch.

my concern with companies like mine, which shall remain anonymous here, are such users. why do they let fucking people walk all over their employees and expect people to stand there and take shit from these fuckers all day?

they're pathetic if they think people always end up being like that. i say my mind to these fucking people, if you can't communicate with me in a professional manner, in a fucking professional environment, because bitch i don't know you and don't give a shit about you either, then i will REFUSE to fucking even look at you, try me. there should be a bill passed to protect people who work in places like i do, where i'm scared that one of these people will walk behind the counter and slash me. ugh.

i think a lot of you can relate and know exactly what i am talking about.

which kind of sucks, i think we as a society are utterly depressed and sadistic people.

and some people just need to be thrown off the face of the planet. agreed?

stupid me!

Oh God.
i miss the MOST important meeting, which was a conference call, for work and now i feel stupid.
this is for my new job and everyone is super nice.
though i have a good excuse, because i'm not feeling well at all, i still feel terrible, but i guess telling them the truth will help.
well i left my manager a message, and all she said was . Ok..
what a bunch of horse shit!
wish me luck, i go in bright and early, and feeling stupid. :'(
xx

MIA!

hiiii guys.
i've been missing in action due to the two new jobs.
as you can tell.. it is a bit hectic for me because i still need to get used to the routine.
otherwise.. i have loads of stories i want to tell you, but won't be until later on this week..
so if you miss me, i miss you too.
hehaha.
i'm soo tired, beyond belief i don't have a day off.. until.. i don't even know. which sad in a sense.
anywho
much loves readers : )
xx
s.a

fuck work, give me money everyone :D

i don't know how people do it.
i just got a second part-time job today and i didn't even start work yet, and i can feel myself stressing.
i just started work recently.. i had an injury right before the summer, i'll tell you guys about it another time, right now i'm still in agony from the tooth..or teeth i don't know, well that injury cost me my ex-job and so now that i have returned to the work force, i've gone in full force and for the first time i'll be trying two jobs at once and i'm so scared.
i don't want them to interfere and the second job's manager scares me. she knows i have another job and so is a bit compassionate, doesn't make me less scared though.
let's see where it takes me.
and job #1 is annoying me with intensive training.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh :( i'm dyingggggg of stress and a broken-jaw type pain.
UGH.