Wake me up when it's over

I need to sleep and I miss my life being normal. I miss my dog. I miss not having hip/knee pain (from my latest injury.. Yawnnnnn). I miss my friend who lays in a grave. I miss the drive I had to live life to the fullest. I miss driving without fear. I miss smiling. I miss not having to fight back tears cause I don't believe today is real. I miss the appreciation I once had for my daily breath of life. I wish I could once again take in the fact that I am still here. Somehow I feel guilty that I am and she isn't. I wish my Cherry was here. She always understood my pain. I don't want to believe everything that's happening right now.

I am afraid of tomorrow. I am scared for what's next. Is this a nightmare?