I seek mountains (the false truth)

As I sit here bottle feeding my newborn nephew, I can't help but remember the moment when I was getting ready earlier; grabbing the little roll that petruded from underneath my bra clasp. As he sips and breaths rhythmically, I think about how my thighs that have hugged for the last two decades. As he looks dearly at me, slowly drifting off to sleep, I think about my belly, soft, pudgy, and awfully meaty. 

I wonder when I hold my own child in the future, will I tell her the stories of my body? I wonder if I will criticize what I look like once I grow a child inside my belly? Will I continue to ridicule the skin I was born with? 

I want to be honest with you, I love my body, every nook and cranny of it. I want to teach you a new way to look at yourself, to let your inner negativity go.

I worry that self love is a lesson not learned through love, but through association of what we assume what love is. I worry that we have a flawed view of this said love. I worry that there is so much self hate, that people are dying to live as someone else, not allowing that beautiful inner self to blossom. 

Refer to the last post for the second version of this. I wanted to post this to show how my vision altered as I thought more deeply, as I focused on what I truly felt. That confidence and love for myself became undeniable as always.